October 2005

Sunday, October 30, 2005

i keep coming back for more
i got to spend some cool time with earl this weekend. first he joined kate, beth and i at the Dayton Art Institute and then hung out here. this evening he came over at my invitation to work on homework. it's just fun hanging out with him. but every time he's gone i miss him. i don't know what my problem is. i think that we enjoy doing lots of things together. i also think i'm craving undivided male attention and interest. (that's hardly cool of me.) regardless....all these things make me want to spend more time with earl so i don't have to miss him. oh....i wrote kyle a letter today. i must stop being so silly about all this. b/c i also find kerry intriguing, if only his clothes weren't so wrinklely.
posted by bekah @ 8:49 PM 0 comments

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

give me one moment to catch my breath, inhale, feel life again, moving at a normal pace. everything, but mostly theatre, has been so busy lately. never before in my life have i felt this overwhelmed by anything. i feel as if i lost time with friends, family, roomates, those i love. i want a few hours to sit down and enjoy the company of those i care about, conversing or laughing or cuddeling. i wanted more time with ben this past weekend to sit and catch up on how everything and nothing is. i wanted to do something super fun. i wanted to run away to europe. i want to stop my attachment with kyle.i am a selfish whore. look at me God! i do nothing to merit favor or love. i fail to delight in you on any level. what the hell is my problem? you have given me a year so full of theatre stuff that it's drowning me, yet all i can do is complain and run around doing rediculous, awful things. earl, he likes me. i like him. by why in the world am i finding ben so attractive again. he was high last night and all i wanted was to hold his hand. i also happend to be in a room with 5 boys i have kissed, all at the same time. it was so strange. and then earl and ben and i were all sitting at the same table. they don't know about each other. i was standing there when they met and shook hands. me there. weird.God, get a grip on my life, because i don't have one.
posted by bekah @ 1:03 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

lyrical truth
You sat down next to me, like poetry to wineOut window looked upon a yellow neon signI took your hand while you decided what to doThe only kiss, I ever miss, I shared with youThe other cities hold a memory still of a placeBut, when I dream of London, I can only see your faceRachael Yamagata "I Want You"
posted by bekah @ 9:20 PM 1 comments

Thursday, October 06, 2005

WOW!
God is increadible and so are the prayers of my family.I have one of the leads in Arsenic and Old Lace!!!!!!
posted by bekah @ 8:56 PM 0 comments

Sunday, October 02, 2005

my lips were pure
i didn't kiss anyone this weekend! i was good even when i knew the opprotunity was strongly presenting itself. i was able to drink and keep my head even as i slept between two short boys. haha.my gift was a neat vintage hat from jonny that had belonged to his grandpa. thanks God.
posted by bekah @ 8:40 PM 0 comments